The church is God's family. To qualify for leadership in the church family, a man must have a model family. Don't expect him to make good things happen in church unless good things are happening in his family. A leader must be faithful to one wife, and his wife must be "worthy of respect." He must be "a man whose children believe and are not open to the charge of being wild and disobedient" (Titus 1:6). If a man's marriage is failing or his children walk away from God, he should not be a church leader.

In our society--even in many churches--families are in bad shape. We need mentors and models of Spirit-filled family life. We need pastors, elders, and deacons with integrity and credibility. The church needs leaders who are respected most by those who know them best--their families. Nothing less will do.

A young mother baked some cookies and put them on the kitchen table to cool. She had to play in a softball game, so she grabbed her bat and glove and went out the door, leaving her husband in charge of their two-year-old son. When she got home, she discovered a disaster. The little boy had been in the cookies. He hadn't eaten just one or two. No, the little rascal had taken exactly one bite out of every cookie on the table. The whole batch was ruined and could not be served to guests. Meanwhile, where was her husband? Asleep on a couch. As the woman looked at the bat in her hand, she may have wondered where to use it first, on her useless husband or on the little cookie monster. But rather than explode in a rage, she just shook her head and burst out laughing.

Healthy families know how to laugh. Not everything in life is a laughing matter, but life has plenty of funny moments. You just need to see the humor. Don't react to every little problem like it's a tragedy. Instead, see it as a comedy. If you run into a situation where you're absolutely furious and can't find anything to laugh at, go look in a mirror. The red face, the swollen veins, and the bulging eyes you see in that mirror ought to be good for a laugh.

"If you can't hear it through the ear, you'll feel it through the rear." I heard (and felt) that proverb when I got spankings as a boy. Did my parents hate me and want me to end up miserable? No, they loved me and wanted me to end up happy. Sinful folly leads to sadness and death; holy wisdom leads to gladness and life. Godly discipline drives that message home.

A happy family is not where parents draw no boundaries and impose no punishments. Out-of-control homes are miserable. A happy home is where parents are firm, fair, and loving, like our heavenly Father. "The Lord disciplines those he loves... The Father of our spirits ... disciplines us for our good, that we may share in his holiness" (Hebrews 12:6-10).

Picture this: Joseph and Mary live together without being married. When Mary becomes pregnant, she aborts the baby because it's unplanned. Later she becomes pregnant again and has a baby named Jesus. After a brief maternity leave, Mary goes back to her full-time job and puts Jesus in daycare. Meanwhile, Joseph is so eager to make money for a bigger house that he leaves for work before Jesus wakes up and returns after Jesus is in bed.

When Jesus reaches school age, Mary and Joseph send him to Caesar Public School, where no religion is permitted except emperor worship. Still, they want their boy to have a taste of the religion they grew up with. So each Sabbath, while Joseph plays golf, Mary drops Jesus at Sabbath school to hear something about God for a few minutes. Joseph and Mary don't want to force religion on him. They let Jesus decide for himself whether to revere the emperor of Rome or the God of heaven.

In the Bible, having many children is a blessing from God. But in our society, if a couple has more than two children, people sneer, "Haven't they heard of birth control?" Babies are seen as a frightful invasion to be halted.

Babies are an invasion, all right. They are an invasion of love into our selfishness, an invasion of joy into our dullness, an invasion of mystery into our predictability, an invasion of purpose into our aimlessness, an invasion of wonder into our boredom, an invasion of life to carry on after we die. Babies are God's invasion of blessing, promise and future.

After Pentecost, the Holy Spirit kept adding to the church, and not just one individual at a time. The Holy Spirit added whole families. The Pentecost promise of the Holy Spirit "for you and your children" was confirmed in household baptisms. When the Spirit opened Lydia's heart to believe the gospel, Lydia was not the only one affected. "She and the members of her household were baptized." When the suicidal jailer asked, "What must I do to be saved?" he was told, "Believe in the Lord Jesus, and you will be saved--you and your household." The man believed, his despair turned to joy, and "he and all his family were baptized."

A gospel that speaks only of a personal relationship to God but not a family relationship to God is not the full gospel. The gospel addresses households; it's normal to respond as households. Biblical faith declares, "As for me and my household, we will serve the Lord" (Joshua 24:15). In the New Testament, when the head of a household was baptized, the rest of the household was also baptized. Today, too, churches should baptize not only individual converts but also family members under their care.

Saul had never met Jesus before and yet Jesus told him that when Saul killed Stephen and when he jailed the men and women who were Christian, Saul was hurting Jesus.  The pain that they felt, He felt. The suffering and hardship that they suffered, He suffered with them.  It was as though Jesus was standing beside His children, Himself being stoned; Himself being jailed.

Imagine that seven weeks ago last Friday, you were in a mob calling for Jesus to be killed. A reluctant governor said, "It is your responsibility," and you howled, "Let his blood be on us and on our children" (Matthew 27:25). But now you learn that Jesus lives and reigns. "God has made this Jesus, whom you crucified, both Lord and Christ." How can there be any hope for someone who murdered him? Won't you and your children be cursed forever? You asked for it.

But, believe it or not, the very Christ you killed is offering you new life on this day. What a surprise! You cursed him, you brought curses on yourself and your family, but he offers blessings to you and your family. Though an enemy of God with blood on your hands, you can be saved. Just repent, be baptized in Jesus' name for the forgiveness of your sins, and you will receive the gift of the Holy Spirit. The Spirit will fill you with new life, power, and joy, and he will do the same for your children.

Parents can bring their children to Jesus, even if the children can't understand what's happening and can't make their own decision. A demon-possessed boy couldn't make a decision for Christ, but the boy's father brought him to Jesus, and Christ made a decision for the boy. A demon-possessed girl didn't seek Jesus, but her mother did, and the Lord saved the daughter from the demon (Matthew 15:21-28). Babies can't speak or figure out doctrines, but when parents brought babies to Jesus, the Lord  declared, "The kingdom of God belongs to such as these."

A married woman needs to know that she's not just the mother of children who need her. She needs to know that she's the wife of a man who treasures her.

At times a mother can feel almost like a slave as she tries to meet the needs of children. Changing diapers, wiping noses, washing clothes, preparing meals, stopping kids from fighting, making sure homework gets done--such things are important in shaping precious persons, but they can smother a mother if her husband is just one more kid making demands. A busy mother needs her husband to be involved with the children. She also needs to know that she is the love of his life, that he is crazy about her.