In order for a person to go to hell, what must happen? Nothing at all! If nothing happens, if you remain your same old self and are not born again into a living faith in Jesus, then you are ready for hell just the way you are. Jesus said, "No one can see the kingdom of God unless he is born again" (3:3). "Whoever does not believe stands condemned already" (3:18).

In order to have eternal life, something must happen: "You must be born again" (3:7). And you can't be reborn on your own; you must be "born of the Spirit" (3:8). Although you can't see God's Holy Spirit or his hidden work of rebirth, you experience a clear, conscious result: believing in Jesus.

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If someone sins, someone suffers. If someone obeys, someone flourishes. God's justice requires it. So how can we not suffer in hell if we have sinned? And how can we flourish forever if we haven't obeyed God perfectly?

Only through the great exchange.

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The first key to happiness is facing our problem. The Bible says that no one is righteous, that all have become worthless (3:12)? But are we really so bad? Sure, certain people are rotten, but many of us don't feel all that evil.

 Think for a moment of bodily sickness. How do we know we have a bad illness? Pain can be one sign of trouble. But what if we have no pain and feel fine? Does that mean we're healthy? Not necessarily. A routine checkup at the doctor may reveal a deadly sickness like AIDS or cancer. Even if we don't feel it, the doctor says it, the test shows it, and we'd better believe it.

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If our only secure comfort is Christ, and if the main reason we exist is God-glorifying gladness, then we should pursue happiness in the Lord. But what does that involve? "What must you know to live and die in the joy of this comfort? Three things: first, how great my sin and misery are; second, how I am set free from all my sins and misery; third, how I am to thank God for such deliverance" (Heidelberg Catechism).

Key #1: Know the problem. Many of us don't know the mess we're in. Fun times make us think life is going well. But these pleasures trick us and addict us. We are "foolish, disobedient, deceived and enslaved by all kinds of passions and pleasures" (3:3). Such things ruin us, harm others, and enrage God. We must admit the mess we're in, or we'll never get out of it.

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Why do we exist? What's the point? "The chief end of man," answers the Westminster Shorter Catechism, "is to glorify God and enjoy him forever." Glorifying God and enjoying him are not two separate things but one. As John Piper puts it, "God is most glorified in us when we are most satisfied in him."

God is glorified not by grumpiness but by gladness. When we taste God's goodness and love, we "shout for joy" and "worship the Lord with gladness."   St. Augustine (around 400 A.D.) wrote, "It is the decided opinion of all who use their brains, that all men desire to be happy." We pursue happiness because God designed us that way, and we find true happiness only in Him. Augustine prayed, "You stimulate us to take pleasure in praising you, because you have made us for yourself, and our hearts are restless until they rest in you."

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What is my only comfort in life and in death?

"That I am not my own, but belong--body and soul, in life and in death--to my faithful Savior Jesus Christ. He has fully paid for all my sins with his precious blood, and has set me free from the tyranny of the devil. He also watches over me in such a way that not a hair can fall from my head without the will of my Father in heaven: in fact, all things must work together for my salvation. Because I belong to him, Christ, by his Holy Spirit, assures me of eternal life and makes me whole-heartedly willing and ready from now on to live for him" (Heidelberg Catechism Q&A 1).

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A man who lives by God's Word "is like a tree planted by streams of water, which yields its fruit in season and whose leaf does not wither. Whatever he does prospers" (Psalm 1:3). As the river of God's Spirit nourishes the man of the house, his wife and children also flourish and grow. Their home is full of the fruit of the Holy Spirit: "love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control" (Galatians 5:22-23).

Family life in our society is as dry and withered as a desert. But that makes every oasis stand out all the more. Flourishing families, watered by the Spirit of Christ, are hard not to notice. Some may think these families are weird because they're not like the desert around them, but others will want to know their secret. They will long to have the living water of eternal life for themselves. What a thrilling opportunity for the godly! As we walk with God, he blesses our marriages, he blesses our children, and he uses our families to attract others to the Lord Jesus Christ.

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Recreational romance is dating for the sake of fun feelings and physical pleasure, with no thought of marriage. Even among Christians, such dating patterns are common--and devastating. When young people are told that it's okay to play games with romantic and physical passion but that intercourse is a no-no, they are being set up for failure. Most become sexually impure. If they do eventually marry someone, the one-flesh union is harmed by past sexual relationships. Also, if they date and then drop one person after another, they tend to treat marriage the same way. They quit when the going gets tough and go after someone else who seems more appealing. Recreational romance provides practice for divorce.

Christian courtship rejects the dating game. The aim of courtship is to get a godly spouse "in holiness and honor." If you're too young for marriage, you're too young for romance. Wait until you have the maturity and work skills to support a new household. When you meet someone special, don't just seek short-term fun. Your main goal in starting a relationship must be to find out if the two of you are meant for marriage. Seek God's guidance. Get the input of parents and family. Avoid backseats and bedrooms until marriage. Develop a spiritual and personal bond first. When you get married, the physical union will be all the better. If you treat romance as a game, you lose. If you seek a spouse in holiness and honor, you win.

PRAYER--Father, make us holy and wholesome. Forgive our sins, and change us. Guide families in Christian courtship, and bless new marriages with your grace. Amen.

If some strangers walked into your house and started cursing and hitting each other, would you sit back and enjoy it? No, you'd kick them out. If sleazy people sneaked into your home and started undressing in front of your kids, would you welcome them and let the whole family watch? Absolutely not! But when such people try to enter your house through television or computer, do you stop them?

Most parents complain that there's too much bad entertainment that harms kids--and most parents do nothing about it. Isn't that being lazy and hypocritical? If your kids watch TV unsupervised in their own room or have their own computer without an internet filter, you as a parent are inviting wicked strangers to sneak in and pollute your children's minds. You are disobeying God and cannot claim God's promises for those who command their children in the right way.

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